flowers

Hmm, too many flowers. They overwhelm me in their variety of color and smell. Humid heat inside the greenhouse. My favorite flowers? Peony and sunflowers. I also like lilacs.

time to think

Although things are happening to me,
I don't feel like I have anything to write, really.
Maybe it's because,
before I knew it,
I didn't have time to think.
And I'm enjoying it.

Saihate

I've been listening to this song lately, and thinking about the kid that committed suicide who went to my school. I wish I could have met him. I wish I knew who he was. I wish I knew "Why?" The spit in the bottle that I read about him didn't give a single clue to who he really was. Obituaries never hold the important things in them. Neither does death.

There are so many versions of this song. I just posted the original version here. Actually, the version that I was listening to was a remix by kz. Most times the original version doesn't even add up to the remixes and versions. Maybe I'll post links to them later. This is actually a sad song. Death and the line "If you get there all right, I'd like a letter or something."

lyrics 

pine cone

A ripped up, chewed. Pine cone on my carpet floor.

Feeling like doing something

I feel like going outside and doing something, but it's already 10:30 at night, and I have to go to bed.  Oh, the dilemma. This always happens in the Summer, come to think of it. But it's Spring. I'm just waiting for a blue sky with white clouds.

Dove Real Beauty Sketches

I saw this just now. It's, pretty amazing. I never thought I'd post something I saw as an ad on my blog.

pickled plums

I'm so tired. My eyes feel like pickled plums.

labyrinth

We got caught in a labyrinth of tiled hallways, concrete staircases, black doors, backwoods closets full of nothing important, but everything personal, and a thousand vibrant green exit signs pointing every which way. I wish I had more time to read the cork board that had been drawn all over by a bunch of different people. Things like that..

Shower

Ugh, somehow today felt like I was standing on a bridge over waterworks. Well, I got home and ate some, cleaned up a bit, took a shower. After I took a shower, I felt like everything went down the drain, so I feel much better! Now, just for the awaiting homework...

Just Be Friends

Well, since I posted Hello/How are you two days ago, I feel the need to put up Just Be Friends. I heard the remix version right when I heard the band version of Hello/How are you, so to me they go together. Same sort-of thing with *Tear* , and the original Hello/How are you. They seem to go together to me too. These videos are both covers, with the first one the North-T Arrange remix version by Himawari, and the second  one a cover by T Shounen(guy) singing to a piano version. They almost sound like completely different songs, and they give me completely different feelings when I listen to them. The original version and video(I like it) by Luka Megurine (vocaloid) is in the link at bottom right along with the lyrics. Even though it's usually sung by a girl, the perspective is actually the guy's(learned that just now).

Original version- Luka Megurine

lyrics

Care

Everything would be so easy if only I didn't care. But, somehow I feel that would be a waste. So maybe the thing I have to do is find the right things to care for. And forget the rest.

Small world

I'm bored. Today seems to be filled with half-said sentences and points. I have to do my homework, but I'm procrastinating it until I feel guilty enough to do it. My world seems so small. A small world is okay, and it's comfortable, but I want it to grow. I want to see more things, do more things, be more things. That side of me is human, maybe? Always desiring something more. Whatever, someone give me a taco.

Mark Twain

"The secret to getting ahead is getting started."
"You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus."
"Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand."
"Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been."
"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."
"Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain."
"Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary."
"What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself."
"When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain."
"When red-haired people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn."
"Thunder is good, thunder is impressive; but it is lightening that does the work."
"The finest clothing made is a person's own skin, but, of course, society demands something more than this."
"Better a broken promise than none at all."
"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
"Necessity is the mother of taking chances."
"The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in heaven."
~Mark Twain

I think I wrote a bit too much, but that's okay. I love this stuff.

Hello/ How are you

I've loved this song for years. The lyric meaning fits me perfectly when I'm down. When I'm feeling useless and hopeless. First video is original version('cept it's a cover), and the second one is my favorite:  band version.

This is a pretty popular song, actually. 

lyrics

*Tear*

Things I cannot fully convey. Please smile for me

lyrics

Acoustic Arrange version (man singing)

Chains of Thought

Today was one of those days. When I got home I couldn't stop wanting to cry. Just how many chains from my past must I break to live in the present? When can I stop living in the future plagued by the past? I think too much. I know this, but somehow it's not something I can really stop that easily. It's not thinking that's the problem; it's the way the thoughts build themselves. Mine tend to build themselves in chains. I keep learning, and struggling, and freeing myself of a few at a time; it's getting to be exhausting. Five years is a long time. And I keep tripping over the broken pieces on the floor, like an idiot. Chained, like a beast. There's always another story. There's always another reality. There's always another perception. Just waiting to break open. Just waiting to shatter. So tired.

Tigers de plushy

The snow tiger stuffed animal that I always sleep with suddenly found itself with a temporary offspring of a different color.

Out of Battery

Surprise, surprise!
This morning, an angel architecture concert,
Lost my umbrella I used against the snow
My sleeping baby ran out of battery.

Lied again.

Sorry mum.
I lied again.
I feel worse now that you
believed me.

Everything except homework

This break I managed to clean my room, organize my desk drawers to perfection, finally put together that music stand in my closet, and organize my clothes(picking which ones to throw out, and putting the new ones in). On Monday we had gone to see dead people(mummy's). It's great how I managed to do practically everything except my homework.

mountains and roofs

Ahh, I'm tired, and have the feeling of a beautiful break coming to an end. I dislike that feeling, so much I try and do stuff to distract myself from it. I finally got up into the mountains again after a long winter and stretched my legs. I really like it up in high places. I like the feeling of the wind, and the smell of it. I would always try to find ways to get on top of the roofs of the shed and things around my old house. I've never fallen, but there are other dangers besides that..

Ivy Bridge Amv

This is cute. After I saw this, I went and watched the show= Usagi Drop(Bunny drop). I had a large affect on me when I first saw it, mainly to do with my littlest brother. In the end, family is what really matters.

Eating the Media

I 'eat' the books, movies, shows,music, etc., that I like. I eat it all up, just like Bungaku Shoujo...except not so literally. It gets tasteless eating the same thing over and over again, so I've been trying to find other ones that are also tasty. I'm like a survivor on some t.v. show. I go days without finding any food.... and I cry myself to sleep (idiot found).

Punch.

It's always awkward when you only know how to give a half-hearted punch. When you're half-baked and simply don't know what the heck you're doing.

Scissorhands

Scissorhands! Reminds me of Edward scissorhands, that movie. A cover by clear. Read the lyrics.

lyrics

original song by Miku

guitar cover by Osamuraisan

Dusk

My favorite time of all is dusk. I love the colors, and I love the feeling of calm that comes with the setting of the sun. The slip of time between day and night; when the city lights turn on like a million stars. Around each of those stars are planets; around each of those lights are people. Each person holds a thousand stories just waiting to be whispered like a bed-time lullaby. The indigo sky waiting for it's stars. It only stays a few minutes. The last twittering of the birds, the smell of a sweet rainy breeze. A gentle caress away from life; a rift in time. Timeless. My favorite time of all.